“Because you don’t know how to ask for help.”
“Because you feed everybody before yourself.”
“Because you still put a cup at Thomas’s old place some mornings even though you hated him.”
Clara stared.
“You noticed?”
“Yes.”
“Why do you think I do that?”
“I don’t know.”
Neither did she.
Habit.
Grief.
Anger.
The body remembered routines even when love was absent.
Silas continued.
“I stayed because you look at me like I’m a man, not a size.”
Clara smiled.
“You mention your size constantly.”
“It’s impressive.”
“Modest too.”
“Exceptionally.”
She laughed.
Then silence.
Silas’s voice lowered.
“I stayed because I want you.”
Clara’s amusement disappeared.
Not fear.
Heat.
He looked at her.
“But wanting you does not give me a right to you.”
She swallowed.
“I know.”
“And if all I ever get is sitting here sometimes, that is what I’ll take.”
Clara studied him.
For months she had told herself she needed time.
True.
But sometimes time became another hiding place.
She stood.
Silas looked confused.
Clara held out her hand.
He stared.
“What?”
“Come inside.”
His expression changed.
“Clara.”
“Yes.”
“Are you sure?”
“No.”
He did not move.
She smiled softly.
“But I’m choosing.”
That was enough.
Silas took her hand.
Inside, Jake slept in the small room.
The cabin fire burned low.
Clara closed the bedroom door.
Silas stood several feet away.
Suddenly the giant cowboy who could face armed men looked uncertain.
Clara almost laughed.
“You’re nervous.”
“Yes.”
“Good.”
He smiled.
She approached.
Her cream nightdress exposed her shoulders beneath the loose gathered neckline.
Silas’s eyes moved over her carefully.
Not taking.
Appreciating.
Clara felt beautiful.
Not because he told her.
Because of the way he looked.
She touched the open front of his shirt.
“You once said I’d never met a man your size.”
Silas smiled.
“I may have been teasing.”
“Only may?”
“A little.”
Clara’s hands rested against his chest.
“And you said you wanted to show me what I’d been missing.”
His expression became serious.
“That depends what you think I meant.”
She raised an eyebrow.
Silas touched her cheek.
“I meant this.”
“What?”
“A man strong enough not to need your fear.”
Clara’s eyes filled unexpectedly.
Silas continued.
“A man who can hold you without keeping you.”
“A man who can want you without owning you.”
Clara leaned into his hand.
“And tonight?”
“Tonight you choose every step.”
She kissed him.
The rest belonged to them.
No violence.
No debt.
No endurance.
Whenever Clara tensed, Silas stopped.
Whenever she moved closer, he followed.
Nothing happened because she was his wife.
She was not.
Nothing happened because he saved her from snow.
Nothing happened because he paid a doctor.
It happened because Clara wanted him.
That difference changed everything.
Later she lay against his chest listening to his heartbeat.
His arm rested carefully around her.
Clara laughed softly.
Silas looked down.
“What?”
“You really are absurdly large.”